Hurricane Brain

You’re distracted. Emotionally. There is a stressor that’s all over your body. You feel like you’re hyper-alert, but you’re not actively accomplishing anything. There’s probably another word for it—but we’ll call it hurricane brain.

Thinking/Planning + Attempting to be Present

I noticed that I struggle with hurricane brain when I am trying to talk to adults while also actively managing my kids. After I noticed this pattern, I began to see the same context across many different settings—socializing with other parents at birthday parties, managing a phone call while also attending to their requests, checking out at the grocery store.

Consider these possible contexts

• Having a difficult/unpleasant exchange with a boss, co-worker, or customer/client and struggling with the next task you attempt
• Simultaneously planning for an event or holiday while also attempting to enjoy it
• Calculating expenses while trying to be present on a carefully budgeted vacation
• Managing a healthcare issue or life transition for you or a loved one while also wanting to be calm and compassionate

Doing Two Things Not Well

Perhaps the best way to unravel the chaos is to set boundaries. This will place some distance between the emotion in one direction and the planning in the other.

Setting Boundaries 1-2-3

1. Acknowledge the conflict.
2. Accept that engaging with both scenarios will not work—you will need to focus on just one.
3. Make an intentional decision to adjust your response. If there is guilt or regret, notice it but do not engage with it.

ACKNOWLEDGE, ACCEPT, ADJUST

Context	Setting Boundaries Solution
Feeling upset, but have work to do	Accept that work cannot be done when you feel like this. Re-set your context by making a small connection (text a friend, go outside, make a hot beverage, freshen up).
Feeling unwell physically, but having things that you need to do	Decide what is reasonable, find ways to adapt the tasks or time, identify how you can take care of yourself when the work is done.
Having to take care of yourself, and others too	Be honest about what you need to do as a caretaker, and what you want to do (or feel you have to do). Today might be the day that giving all you have means not doing everything you want (the motivation created by guilt is not productive, it pushes you further away from connection).

It’s all good.

Sometimes feeling like this indicates a that a motivation to escape is having some influence. Expectations and other pressure we place on the events in our day prevent connection and change our motivation from seeking value to escaping unpleasantness (read more). Reconnecting with what you value in these situations will make the situation a little bit better for right now, and continuously better in the long-term.

Are you ready for something different?